Merchant Crab

Suze lay fast asleep on Clovis’s chair as the guildmaster and the crab both stood on opposite sides of a table covered with papers and all sorts of random items.

“You drive a hard bargain, but you’ve got yourself a deal!” the thief declared with a smile and a slap on the table.

For the past half hour, the two of them had been enthusiastically discussing a trade deal for the Scroll of Potential that Balthazar had spotted in the vault. Offers and counteroffers were presented, arguments over what would be a fair trade for it were given, and plenty of tongue wagging was made before reaching an agreement.

Clovis had proven a skilled negotiator, and as much as Balthazar would not willingly admit it, the crab was greatly enjoying the verbal sparring he had been lacking since leaving the pond.

“Great! Glad we got to an agreement,” the merchant said as he used his claw to push the piles of bottles, papers, and a few kitchen utensils back into his backpack.

“And I’ll be taking this to my people. We will put it to great use,” said Clovis as he rolled up the map of the Onion Crew’s stashes.

The guildmaster seemed very interested in the locations marked on it, and Balthazar was more than happy to trade it away, since it was of no use to him now that he already knew where the stolen mangoes were.

In the end, the merchant managed to walk away with the scroll and even got Clovis to share a map of the floors of Damask Manor that he had one of his agents “procure” from the local building offices under the cover of night. All in exchange for the Onion Crew’s stash locations and a bottle of the extremely rare “Oceanic Essence Perfume.”

The bottle was actually just full of fish liver oil. But since the thief lord seemed delighted enough with its smell and certain that all the ladies would fall head over heels for his new scent, who was the crab to deny him what he desired? He was more concerned with wondering why someone back home had packed a flask of fish oil of all things in his backpack.

“Penny, dear, please make a dozen copies of this when you get a chance, will you?” the man said to the woman still counting coins at her desk.

She glanced up at the stash map he was giving her. “Sure, sure. Just put it there on the pile. I’ll get to it when I’m done with the other fifty things you already asked me to do.”

“Thanks, you’re a doll,” the charming thief said as he went back to the negotiation table. “What would I ever do without you!”

Penny rolled her eyes behind the thick magnifying lenses of her spectacles before returning to counting coin stacks.

“I hope whatever adventurer you got working with you will put that to good use,” Clovis said, pointing at the Scroll of Potential in the crab’s pincer. “It was of little use to me, but I still liked it as a collection item. Still, if it means knocking those bandits back into their gutter, it’s worth the cost.”

“Heh, right,” Balthazar said with a slightly nervous chuckle as he stored the scroll in the backpack. “I’ll save this to give it to my… adventurer friend later, yes.”

The crab approached Suze and gave her arm a shake.

“Hey, kid, wake up. It’s time to go.”

Her groggy eyes opened with difficulty and she looked around. “Huh? Wha… Where am I?”

“In the secret vault of the Marquessian Thieves Guild, young lady,” the guildmaster told her with a grin. “And I’d recommend you don’t try to leave with any of its contents.”

He stood over the chair, staring into her eyes with a mischievous smirk and an open hand.

“Fine…” the street urchin grumbled as she reached into her pocket and retrieved a shiny silver ring with a sapphire.

“Thank you very much,” Clovis said after she placed it on his hand. “Don’t be upset. I’m not mad. Slightly impressed, in fact. After this whole ordeal is over, come find us again, if you want to learn a few new things.”

“Alright, calm down, thief lord,” Balthazar said with a slight frown. “The deal was for the map, not for a new apprentice too.”

“Oh?” the knave exclaimed with mocked surprise. “I did not realize the young miss was something to you?”

“Yeah, he’s my uncle Balthazar from my cousin’s side, thrice removed,” the girl lazily said as she hopped off the chair. “Let’s just go. I’m tired of the stuffy air in this place.”

The vault door rumbled open and the man Balthazar had tried to deliver the passphrase to earlier appeared.

“Moe?” said the guildmaster. “Something happened?”

“Not yet. But just thought I’d let ya know I’ve spotted some bandit-types lurking around outside the tavern. They look like they’re searching for someone.” The rough rogue eyed the crab and the girl. “Probably these two.”

“Hmm,” Clovis said, rubbing his scruffy chin. “They should know better than to come into the tavern to start trouble with us. Then again, they might be feeling emboldened as of late.”

“You want me to call the rest of the boys?” asked Moe.

“No. At least not yet. Go back up, keep an eye on things. I’ll see our guests out and then come up there myself.”

The other man nodded and disappeared through the vault door again, locking it behind him.

The author's content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

“Please, follow me this way,” said the guildmaster. “As a parting gift, allow me to escort you out through our escape tunnel, so that nobody sees you. It seems you are fugitives now.”

The crab tilted his shell. “I guess we are…”

From reputable merchant to crab on the run from city guard and bandits alike. And all because he was looking for directions and stopped for some mango pie.

My stomach will be my undoing one day.

Moving a bookshelf aside and pushing a heavy black door open, the thief led them through a tight tunnel with a torch in hand.

“Bye, Ms. Penny!” Suze said with an energetic wave of her hand at the woman barely visible behind the stacks of money.

“This will take us a couple of streets away from the tavern. Once you’re out, try to move swiftly and stay out of sight. I will go back up to the tavern and do what I do best.”

“And what’s that?” asked the crab.

Clovis smirked with all of his pearly whites as he cracked open an old wooden door.

“Be my radiant and charming self to keep all of their attention on me while you two escape. Farewell and good luck, Mr. Balthazar and Ms. Suze.”

With a flowery bow, the thief and his torch retreated into the tunnel, leaving the crab and the girl in a dark and cluttered alley.

“Alright, you heard him, let’s move,” the merchant said, heading to the only visible way out ahead.

“Wait, what about Blue and Druma?” Suze asked as she followed him.

“They were safe up on the roofs,” Balthazar responded as he peeked out of the alley. “I’m sure they spotted the bandits lurking around. They know how to handle themselves if needed, and I’m sure Blue will be able to sniff her way to me.”

“Eww, maybe you should bathe more often then,” the young rascal remarked as they skittered down the street.

The crab grumbled as they turned a corner. “That

His words were cut short and his eyestalks stood up as they saw a pair of bandits with torches up ahead.

“There!” one of them said. “It’s the crab the boss wants!”

With his pointy feet skidding on the polished cobblestones, Balthazar turned around to run in the other direction.

“No, it’s not!” he shouted. “Totally different giant crab! I can’t even talk! I mean… blub blub!”

The ruffians started running after the crab and the girl, torches held high as they shouted their location to other bandits nearby.

“Through here!” said Suze as she pulled the crustacean into a passage between two houses.

“This place is too narrow!” Balthazar exclaimed as the girl led him by the arm through the increasingly tighter space.

Just as they were about to exit onto the next street, the sides of the crab’s shell hit the corners and he became stuck.

“Damn it!”

“You shouldn’t have eaten all that carrot cake!” the little girl said as she used all her might to pull him out by the arm.

“That’s got nothing to do with this!”

A bright flare of light appeared at the end of the street and a lone bandit shouted, “I see them!”

“Argh! Hurry up, pull!” Balthazar exclaimed as he kicked all his legs.

“I’m trying!” said Suze.

“Gotcha!” the rushing bandit yelled as he put his hand on the girl’s shoulder.

Balthazar reached forward with his free arm and wrapped his pincer around the man’s wrist. “Oh no you don’t!”

“Ahhh!” the thug screamed in pain as the crab twisted his arm.

The bandit let go of Suze and dropped the torch to grasp his injured wrist as he stumbled back, tears of pain rolling down his ugly face.

Letting go of the merchant for a moment, the street urchin gave the man a quick kick to the shin, making him fall on his back with even louder cries of pain.

“Come on, pivot, you oversized clam!” Suze yelled as she grabbed hold of Balthazar’s arm again.

“Just… a little… more! And I’m not a clam!” the merchant said right as his carapace scraped through the corners and he fell forward.

“Let’s go! They’re coming!”

The pair ran down the street, weaving and dodging as they saw the lights and heard the shouts of more bandits quickly surrounding their location.

“We’re running out of options here, kid!” Balthazar said.

“Look!” the girl exclaimed, pointing up.

A goblin on the back of a hovering drake waved frantically at them from above.

“Haha, Druma! I told you they’d find us. I think they’re trying to guide us from the sky. Let’s follow them!”

Running through alleys and across streets, the crab and the girl dodged and swerved as they avoided the incoming bandits chasing them from every corner, following the path flown by the drake above them until they exited onto the edge of the city canal.

“Crap! What now?” Balthazar said as they both looked down at the long drop into the water. “There’s no bridge to the other side here.”

The voices and lights were getting closer when suddenly a bell rang, making the crab and the girl look upstream.

A ship was sailing down the river, with its sails down and a man at the wheel.

“It’s Captain Leander!” exclaimed Balthazar.

“Get on!” shouted a young woman from the bow.

“And that’s Olivia!” said Suze.

Blue landed on the deck of the ship and Druma hopped off her back, running to a coil of rope on the side.

“I cannot slow down, you will have to jump,” The captain yelled as he brought the boat closer to the edge of the canal.

With Olivia’s help, the goblin threw the rope over to shore, its tip dragging on the ground as the ship passed the two fugitives.

“Go on!” Balthazar told Suze as he glanced back at the streets behind them.

Flame sprites popped from every direction as the chasing Bandits exited onto the dock area.

“There they are! Grab’em!”

“Come on, grab it!” the mayor’s niece shouted as she helped the smaller girl onboard and Druma threw the rope down again.

“I don’t got any hands!” the crab shouted as he ran after the ship and its dragging rope.

“Just jump!” shouted Suze.

Skittering as fast as he could, Balthazar saw the end of the pier up ahead, and with a glance back, the bandits closing in on him.

“Ah, crabapples!”

Out of time or options, Balthazar put his all into a leap, reaching for the rope with the grace of a jumping giant crustacean—which is to say, none at all.

“Oof!”

His pincers closed around the rope just as the tip was about to go out of reach.

“He’s got it! Now climb!” Olivia said as the merchant’s friends watched the crab flapping about in the wind behind the fast-moving ship.

Tightening his grip to pull himself up, Balthazar felt the rope snap between his pincers.

Foiled by his own mighty claws.

“Oh no…”

With a yelp, the group aboard the ship watched as the crab plunged into the river’s depths below.