Chapter 85: classroom
Lucian, after splashing some cold water on his face in the bathroom and taking a few deep breaths to steady himself, finally exited the stall. He straightened his collar, attempting to brush off the tension he felt settling heavy on his shoulders.
As he walked through the halls toward his classroom, he noticed the familiar buzz around him. Groups of students were mingling, laughing, some with their noses buried in their laptops or phones, others clustered in small circles, excitedly discussing the latest campus drama. It was like stepping back in time, the scenes unfolding as they had once before. Lucian felt a surge of nostalgia a strange feeling considering he was technically reliving it all.
The moment he entered the classroom, however, he could feel the shift. Faces turned his way, eyes narrowed slightly, and the whispers began. It was the same routine: a mixture of curiosity, judgment, and subtle disdain flickered in their glances. Lucian kept his expression neutral, sighing inwardly as he made his way to the seats at the back. He was already familiar with this part of college life the unspoken rules that made it easy for some students to drift to the outskirts, to stay unseen.
He climbed up to the highest row of seats, far back in the corner where he had always sat, even in his past life. The last row, the place where no one could look at him directly and where he could observe the classroom without attracting much attention. It was his safe spot, hidden away, a place where he could escape the unrelenting stares and simply blend into the background. As he lowered himself into the seat, he let his fingers trail over the polished wooden surface of the desk, feeling a strange sense of comfort.
Looking down from his vantage point, Lucian could see everyone engrossed in their own lives. The same small cliques, the shared secrets, and the half-concealed laughs that filled the room it was all so familiar, so painfully ordinary, yet now tinted with an overwhelming sense of distance. He felt like an outsider peering into a world he no longer truly belonged to.
Sliding his hand beneath the desk, he felt the familiar texture of his old bag. His worn, black bag was still tucked away under the desk, just as he had left it in his past life. A tiny smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. It was a strange feeling, the simplicity of seeing an object that belonged to his past, yet feeling as though it was a lifetime ago.
He pulled the bag onto his lap and unzipped it, half-expecting to find it empty. The contents were just as he remembered light, almost weightless. Lucian chuckled softly to himself, recalling that he hadn't bothered to carry any real books. Who was he kidding? He never came here for the academics. Every single day he had stepped foot in this place, it had been because of Avey. Every glance in her direction, every shared class those moments had been the only lessons he cared about.
He shook his head, the memories settling into the corners of his mind like dust. "Who even brings books to a class they never planned to learn from?" he muttered to himself with a faint smile.
Lucian sat quietly at his desk in the last row, trying to lose himself in thought when he noticed Avey and Cassandra entering the classroom. As they stepped in, the entire room seemed to hold its breath, whispers falling silent. Some students looked over their shoulders, glancing from Avey to him with curiosity. Lucian could feel the heat of their stares, but his own gaze remained on Avey. Despite the distance, he could see the redness around her eyes the unmistakable signs of someone who had cried.
The sight tugged at something deep inside him, but he forced his face into an expressionless mask. His heart felt like it was being pulled in opposite directions, and a painful knot settled in his chest. Avey's tear-streaked face was both familiar and new to him. She looked lost, vulnerable. He remembered her sharp words from his past life, the cruel dismissals and humiliating rejections, but the memories only seemed to amplify the ache he felt for her now.
Lucian leaned back, closing his eyes briefly, attempting to center himself. Why did he still feel this way? She had hurt him deeply enough to drive him to dark places in his last life, enough to shatter him beyond recognition. And yet, here he was, feeling the urge to protect her, even from the pain she brought upon herself. Maybe it was the very depth of his love that made it impossible to hate her. When you love someone more than you love yourself, when that love knows no boundaries or limits, even the worst betrayals can't shake its foundation.
It felt like a curse, one that no amount of time or betrayal could cure. Even after all the heartbreak she had put him through, even after his own death, Lucian couldn't bring himself to erase his feelings for her. They clung to him, like shadows that followed him no matter how far he ran. Was it a weakness? Maybe. But it was also proof of the strength of his love, as twisted and painful as it felt now.
A silent mantra echoed in his mind: Stay away, protect yourself. He had learned it the hard way in his past life. Loving her openly had only brought humiliation, heartbreak, and eventually, his downfall even killed him. But he couldn't shake the memory of her face. imagining how Her tear-stained cheeks and trembling lips her face might be, when his love was raw and unguarded, and her rejections were like sharp daggers.
Lucian shifted in his seat, trying to focus on the present. His commitment to keep his distance was not a declaration that his feelings had vanished far from it. He wished he could stop caring, but it felt impossible. The wounds from his past life hadn't healed; they had simply become scars he carried forward. Now, each look from her, each tear he witnessed, only seemed to peel them open once more.
Yet, he couldn't give in. He was no longer the same Lucian, chasing a love that would only lead him to ruin. Love, he realized now, wasn't enough if it only brought pain. He wanted to spare himself that heartbreak, and perhaps spare her, too. But even as he repeated this to himself, he knew it was a lie he could barely believe. People say nothing goes with you when you die, he thought bitterly, but my love for her followed me back, like an unbroken promise from another life.
Lucian chuckled to himself, the sound bitter and low. The irony wasn't lost on him. Here he was, alive again with a chance to change everything, yet unable to escape the shackles of his own heart.
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guy's send some powerstones send me on ranking he he he he
well thanks for ya all support till now can't say how happy i am..tday was a very happy day for me haha came to tell ya all